Sunday, August 29, 2004
the opposite of love is love is nt hate bt rather indifference
gtta sorta agree wif tt i guess....love and hate are 2 opposite poles....
and well indifference touches each and every1 of us in our lives. be it a brush on the shoulder or a total and full understanding of wat indifference means...
ainlt it sad?
tt we cant cherish those who seek to help us or b frendsly instead we reject them and sae they are irritating or dun bother bout them at all....
sad i guess...
hmm........im guilty of tt too....sighx....
aniwaes...
oh crap tmr is obs....sighx....no more creature comforts for 5 daes i guess....
hope i dun break a leg *Winkx*
meant to b a pun..ok aniwae.
crap...no hp..ok so these daes my hp is sorta dead bt still....*wines* lol....oh yea acty can bring! bt erm...mayb lah c lahz..
whee.....shld b fun hope nobody tries to spray "off" on the tents to "drive off mosquitoes" lol yea rite...drive awae mosquitoes and attract sandflies... riiiiiiite....smart...
anithin else?
oh yea crap ptm on fri though i wun b arnd.....sianz...DOUBLE crap....
im bored.....bleah...sadness
oh yea..im a psf....i knew tt some time ago though i dun think i blogged bout it yeapiex...
-Blogged at 8/29/2004 04:45:00 PM
Monday, August 23, 2004
wowz......
forgt bout my physics bk in e end didn;t hand up...
had to do the DUCK WALK!!!
wat the gary sim rox....lol...
ok supoposed to squat down and walk arnd and flap wings *arms* in this case
hmm....den i did it abit too enthu i think....i was flappin my "wings" like a half crazed duck tts gonna b slaughthered or sth.....
den my class was laughin as per usual...daryl suggested me takin off my tie bt heck lah....
miss d'costa in e otehr class opposite siahz...
bet she gonna sae sth to me tmr..sighx...
issac and gerald supposed to do wif me lol...
bt they like lagin i think...
i juz chiong thru.....
at elast he onli made us do at teh porch i guess....otherwise....dotx dotx dotx..
so yea...
and
heck to u...*no its nt addressed to ani sch ppl*
and emr..anithin else??
ok dun think so...
cya
-Blogged at 8/23/2004 05:25:00 PM
Friday, August 20, 2004
what makes u think ur so great....
its as if u have this oh so grand scheme which i juz have to follow...
do u hgvae my entire life planned out?
right till the day i die?
nuutin is ever ez...so y do u think tt its so ez??
u juz blame me 4 everything..how ez tt is..
what do u want me to do
nuttin i do is gd enough for u
i will alwaes live in my brothers shadow the oh so good and favoured boy
so wat do u want me to do..
dun think ill forget what u did.....
i can forgive.....forgettin is an entirely different matter...
u kip dragging the past up as if u are the only 1 hurt
u dun care a damn bout my feelings...
y dun i drag everything up too juz to c ur stupid face...
and as 4 you....
what makes u think ur so freakin gd...tt u can tell ppl what to do
im tired of being taken for granted i try to help u and u brush it off or takeit as if i owe u really?do i owe u anything?
what do u want me to do??
fine i screwed up once bt juz coz of tt ur gonna throw everythin awae??
hmm..mayb its juz my naivety....
tt frenships can last
bt i dun think it deserves to b called naivety....
more of juz stupidty
oh wellz...
wasted effort??
betcha if qien reads this she might get apoloxy or sth....
hmm....2dae came to sch in a mildy black mood
and i think i scared quite a few ppl...
shen yang was wondering why i didn';t sae hi...
shi xian 2 and quite a few ppl..
hmm.....daniel fong came to me and asked me what was wrong...so shld i sae?
obviously i didn't so i ended up juz walking awae frm chapel...
sorry to matthew....
hmm...jin tai and alvan noticed 4 some reason ok jin tai i understand and alvan....
oh yea ok i realise y they might have noticed
hmm....overall a fairly bad dae in the beginning
bt ltr in the dae it gt betta.....i guess..
didn't feel so screwed
-Blogged at 8/20/2004 04:20:00 PM
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
oh ok...
im dead...
DIE DIE
DIE DIE
tmr common test reutunr to us..
y dun u juz kill me or sth....bleaghx
wodner how many subs i failed.....
DIAOXXXXXX
hope nt 7.... diao diao
double diao and triple diao
oh yea 4 soem reason i kip addin w's into my words outta nowhere
ok i think i dead....im gonna die...
bleaghx
help?
acckkk...
dyin or sth
aww poor jen still sick...
awwwww
ok so im crazy so wat...
oh yea i think ill still abit sick sighz...
2dae played bball....wif some weird ppl def nt sg ppl...
abnd kena trash loz...though i think if andre and buaya kia played den shld b ok bt i had eugene???
and liek i already suck plus eugene abit oversucky lol
kleon and some pro guy palyed bt erm...well...nt exactly saveablelah the team lolz..
so sadz lox...
ok fine kleon u play well alright?
so stop naggin .....
ok...
and lemme c wat else...
oh yea xa is the ger in 301!!!
whaha
ok tts abit crazy bt whu cares?!
u can ask him!!
yea so anithin eklse???
oh eya i think i shld b deemed crazy....
oh yea..,.hi pat....
ok im bored..
hey qien have fun at camp:):)
and hui bin too though u wun read this lolz...
ok im high so wat...
im juz sleepy...
sighx.
-Blogged at 8/17/2004 09:53:00 PM
Sunday, August 15, 2004
hmm....undescrible beauty...
still a mystery to me..tell me how u feel how u react dun keep urself hidden animore ur driven us mad....
wat shld we think wat shld we do?
we r confused...
how do u wish us to react?
wats the problem?
when did it start?
how is it goin to end...unending conflict?
can;t u tll us what u feel?
can u nt tell us what u wish to sae...
can;t u express urself?
w/o anger???
oh yea talked to xa 4 abit durin the overnight stay in sch...
yea well ill try k?
give me support!:)
-Blogged at 8/15/2004 02:53:00 PM
Friday, August 13, 2004
feel....screwed...
tuition juz over....and i feeel terrible...
i feel inevitably trapped...as if i can never escape..
So durin tuition i juz couldn't take it animore..
2 hrs tutition and after 1 1/2 hrs i lost focus and den....
well wat my tcher started sayin juz sounded likie irritating buzzing...my god...
den like...my nerves have already been rubbed raw and patience was reallie thin my god...
help me....
den like so as per usual i thrust my mind into anotehr time and period to calm and relax and refocus..
bt in the end....
well...
my mind went to a time when i went out...
and the conclusion of TT outing was even worse
my concentration was strewn all over e place
and i felt even worse...
my gosh
b4 tt i was like...
prayer forming in my mind!
wow..
den poems..
bt when my mind came to tt outin den like...
still ok den suddenly realisation hits me
and den well dere we go.....
gone...
and i felt more screwed than b4 yea i rock...
i know it 2....
the higher u gt the harder u fall...
yes i agree...
so after the exam i was quite high...bt there was no time for me to rest at all..
after the exams as per usual i was like exhausted bt yet so full of energy...
nerves rubbed raw...
den coem hm start studyin 4 tuition my gosh..
and tuition took an infernaly long time and didnt know WHEN tuition is...
i sh;dnt think 2 much i think..
coz 4 some reason my toght process is really slow bt when certain things surface my mind reacts really fast b4 i can stop it and den...pain.....
ain;t tt juz positively fun...
i juz wanna close my eyes...take a deep breath and let go of my worries and pain juz 4 a moment... bt i know i can;t
where cna i find teh time...
tmr morn i will plae bball thankfully...
hopefully can tire myself beyoond thinking pt...
dne in the afternoon church....late afternoon lo..
and i gtta teach or "help out" iwif catechism classes....
hopefully it will b fine..
in teh nioght gta go sch and next morn go 4 spans and b road marshall...
dismissed at 130...
trigo test on mon retest acty...
and i know i gonna screw it if i dun study enuff....
oh man,,
and physics hw...
chinese hwand revision..
and i sttill can't concentrate on wat im doin... my minds playin tricks on me i dunno wat im doin!
hold my hand hold me tight dun let me go hold on and dun let go..
dun let me b lost again..
i wish i wasn;t hurt so badly i wish i could stand up strong
bt i couldn't and ur hand reached out and held me up
bt still i can;t do it still im weak still im helpless...still im unable to stand tall in myself...
once again i collapse on myself
bt..ur nt there animore...nobody to catch me..
where r u?
searchin 4 u..
bt ur nowhere to b found....
who will help such a person?
take my hand hold it...
take my frenship and make it urs
where r u?
so far yet so near
so distant and so close
clutching me ob the shoulder yet so distant when i turn arnd nobody is there....
where r u??
how long must i b kept in agony waiting 4 u??
alwaes?
4eva???
there goes my happy ending...
can i ever have a happy ever after?
tt onli happens in fairy tales...
ain;t it tempting to juz sink into the sentinence of the sword the simple drill of thrust and recover
the dance of death....or thw watered down version aniwaes...
the shock of a sword when it hits flesh when it comes into contact that slight jerk and recoil..
change comes for everybody...
innocence is such a precious commodity...
its so rare so innocent..
innocence in its purest form is...
touchin it touches u in ur heart
compellin u to help
wishing that innocence was nt lost...
i still rememeber a time when a boy was sitting with his frens on chairs in kidnergarten...
waiting to gt their drinks...(milo probably) and imaining driving a car!! sports car obviously and makin sounds tt sounded like a sports car...
wonder if sze ting or zi jun will read this...
haha
my oh so dear kidnergarten frens....
sill rem this girl and boi who were reallie close and nearly insepreable (zijun and sze ting)
at tt time sze ting was the most rational now i dunno le lahz...
coz too long never c her arnd le so cannot guess...
zi jun has stablised abit while im still fluctuating
hehe
-Blogged at 8/13/2004 09:53:00 PM
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
oh wow....nearly broke down 2dae...
ok fine...
skip cyaz
-Blogged at 8/11/2004 10:24:00 PM
what is the measure of change from Spring to Winter?
oh change change
change comes again
bt this time i experience the change instead of causin it....
oh wellz
how much things change blowin out of our grasp...
oh wellz...
-Blogged at 8/11/2004 10:22:00 PM
typed a few things in chinese gtta on hansvision or sth like tt if u wanna c...
hmm......2dae had e maths and chem common test die loz..
confirm fail 1...
so sigh...
oh yea i did study loz..
abit lah...
bt betta than never wat rite?
this time its nt my fault...
i didn;t try to break this frenship...
mayb u might c this.....who knows..
悲伤还是困着我
扯开不了的痛苦
遇见了天使幸福
而那天使就是你
可是可悲的选择
使我不能了解你
而这是你选的路
这条路我走不了
当天听到了真相
是种种的刀刺心
割伤了脆弱的魂
事到如今的告别
天使再见了拜拜
我这个天使真是
无能为力是因为
我已把翅膀断掉
这是爱所导致的
是极大牺牲可是
还觉得值得如此
再见了我的朋友
以及我自以为的知己
遇见了你真好
从没感到如此
这是多么特别
多么痛苦伤心
那一差那多么
悲伤和甜蜜的
好想悄悄地在
你耳边告诉你
爱的感觉真好
真是伤透了心
就为你而烦恼
痛苦过日子啊
oh yea lol...me an wenhao were tryin to sing ji li xiang in class durin hengs lesson coz he can rem the second part i can rem the 1st part...den we nt too sure bout lyircs so we take out the newspaper and refer...haah
den heng was wondering y i suddne;y so hardworkin whee...no i wun copy and paste the lyrics here.....dot dot dot...
seen u cry seen u fly
seen u sad seen u mad
seen u tired seen u cared
seen u scared seen u fed
awww....crap...
aniwaes....
hm...hmm....
oh yea jen i appreciate it.*places huge smiley here*
btw does anybody where ic an get a gaint smiley picture or sth??
lolz...
esp 1 tt can put into msn pics and use on websites
XDXD
den fun fun...
i still have tt smiley plushie wif me whee....
oh and tt piggy tt wanted to pass over to xiaoyu....
oh wellz...mayb ill kip it 4 myself yay!
heck i mean its cute! i think......
so like...y waste it!..
if not ltr the piggy cry *sobx* nobody to plae wif!!!
oh no...sobx sobx...sadx sadx.....
ok...so tt was lame...so wat?
cna;t help it...
ok i nid repressents and no i ahven study for physics or A maths coz.... gone case le
cool Crtical RO is on and im the onli opne playin siugh....
no lag!!!
bt nobody to tok to...
darn noone to tok to online 2! wif the exception of 1 bt nt tokin eitehr so...
well mayb nt anibody consdierin this and tt
yeapiex
to u....
well i still care even if u dun..
-Blogged at 8/11/2004 04:54:00 PM
